Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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