i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
i drank out of a bidet.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
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