I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
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As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
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We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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