careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize