his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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