im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize