We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
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