Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
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