i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize