Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
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