so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
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He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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