so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Randomize