Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
no you cant smoke seaweed
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
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just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
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Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize