She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Two words: blizzard sex
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Randomize