he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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