Betty ford says i'm here all night
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
His hands were made for my vagina.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
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