god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
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