Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
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please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
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