Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Randomize