we need to drink 2009 down the drain
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
How does it feel to date your dad?
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize