She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
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Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
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Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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