she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
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