I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Randomize