if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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