Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Randomize