I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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