he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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