what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
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