bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I need a burrito and a hug.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize