I feel great
I just peed on a car
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
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