for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
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