i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
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