RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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