Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
my shit smells like andre
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize