Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
Randomize