i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
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I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
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My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
jump out the window naked night went bad
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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