The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize