I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
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