I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
She's the barista slut.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
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