Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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