I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize