I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize