I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Randomize