By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
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