BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
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he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
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i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
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