I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
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he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
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I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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