This is not my ceiling
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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