sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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