That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Randomize