im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
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